being about the Father's business

This convicted me, challenged me, and blessed me oh-so-much. And that's all I'm going to say about it.

"Stick with your work. Do not flinch because the lion roars; do not stop to stone the devil’s dogs; do not fool away your time chasing the devil’s rabbits. Do your work. Let liars lie, let sectarians quarrel, let critics malign, let enemies accuse, let the devil do his worst; but see to it nothing hinders you from fulfilling with joy the work God has given you.

He has not commanded you to be admired or esteemed. He has never bidden you to defend your character. He has not set you at work to contradict falsehood about yourself which Satan’s or God’s servants may start to peddle, or to track down every rumor that threatens your reputation. If you do these things, you will do nothing else; you will be at work for yourself and not for the Lord.

Keep at your work. Let your aim be as steady as a star. You may be assaulted, wronged, insulted slandered, wounded and rejected, misunderstood or assigned impure motives; you may be abused by foes , forsaken by friends, and despised and rejected of men. But see to it with steadfast determination, with unfaltering zeal, that you pursue the great purpose for your life and object of your being until at last you can say 'I have finished the work which Thou gavest me to do.'"
- author unknown

perspective

i could think like this:

tomorrow will be the first of eight consecutive days that i have to work. kill. me. now.

i still have two research papers to write. they were due monday. whoops.

my skin is breaking out.

my butt is getting bigger methinks.

my cat hates me.

 i wish i would have majored in something fun like graphic design.

my room sucks and it's stacked high with wedding crap.

...or i could think like this:

i'm going to have ample opportunity to show Christ to my co-workers this week.

i'll drop to part-time and focus more on school.

my skin could be worse.

B will like my big butt. when we get married, i mean.

i still love my cat.

egalitarianism and complementarianism are fun to study.

i have a cool new rug under all that crap...
that i'm going to use.....
at my wedding....
because i'm getting married...



perspective.
who knew.
-c

ten ways

diy: place cards

i've been working on these pretty babies all evening. i think B would be proud that i actually came up with something original for our wedding--  rather than just recreating some else's genius that i saw on pinterest.

-c

normal

two days before the biggest meltdown of my life, i sat down at the dining room table and jollied in how easily the wedding was coming together. it was almost too easy. i had the photographer of my dreams booked, my mom's renovated wedding dress to wear, a pair of discontinued seychelles shoes that i scored on ebay, a caterer (who doubles as my best friend from high school), musicians (who double as B's friends), an officiant (who doubles as B's dad), and a cabin in the woods (which makes our whole wedding double as a week long family vacation).

and then it was time to tackle the guest list. HANDS DOWN the most daunting thing about planning a wedding y'all. just the thought of having a ton of people there on my wedding day sends me into a hyperventilating frenzy; and on the other hand not inviting them and disappointing them sends me into a hyperventilating frenzy. so either way, there's a hyperventilating frenzy in store. for me at least. i begged brandon all night that night. i begged him to not make me have a wedding.

in a lot of people's eyes "it's not normal" to have such a small wedding, but to me, small is the only normal thing. him, me, our immediate families, and a few of our closest friends hanging out together at home is normal. i want things to be normal as i walk into the new normal. i don't want to be frazzled about a strict schedule of formal & traditional whatevers, and i really don't want a dance floor. i want to sit down at the dinner table with my family and laugh and have conversations together. i want our friends to grab guitars and play music out on the balcony all night. i just want a chance to be together and actually really be together.

contrary to popular belief, a wedding day is not all there is. it just happens to be the first day of even bigger and better days. every day i spend with B as my husband will continue to be the best day of my life, even if it's not all fancy-schmancy and perfect.

because life's not that way.
life is rather normal.

and i'm excited about it.

-c

my best friend's wife

i'm getting married.

wait, really? when did that happen? wasn't it just yesterday that i turned a corner in B&N and ran into him by accident? we constantly (and i mean, constantly) kept bumping into each other after that; a couple more times at the bookstore, and multiple times at jazzman's. we had a movie night at my apartment one night with friends, and i remember going to bed that night thanking God that B and I could be friends again; just like the old times; just like we did before he had a girlfriend.

i missed him.

one night he invited me over for dinner. i expected it to be a social gathering, but when i walked in, there was homemade pasta on the stove and a table set for two. when his roommate came home, we all stood in the kitchen and talked for the longest time. i even told them about a guy i had gone out on a date with; a guy that i was interested in. B and i were best friends... i could tell him those types of things, right? simultaneously, they shot looks at one another. B hesitated in a response, looking nervous and so let down. "what the heck is going on?" i thought. "why are they being so weird about this?"

 i drove home that night putting pieces of the night together. it wasn't normal. he wasn't being normal. i started practicing how i'd let him down, just in case it had been a date; just in case he was interested. we'd been here before; on the brink of being friends and being something more-- and honestly, i just didn't want to go there again.

about a month later, after another dinner at his house, he randomly grabbed my hand out of nowhere and wouldn't let go. i tried desperately to remember my "let's-stay-friends" speech, but i just couldn't. "this is your best friend," I thought.. "and he's holding your hand right now. weird-- but it's right."

And now, almost a year later-- that hand is promised to him.

this summer, my whole life will change.
 i'll be my best friend's wife.

when did that happen?

-c#2b

it's a wonderful life

hey bloggums,
I'm home for a few days, chillin' out with the madre, helping her put her house back together after it's spectacular remodel, facebook stalking, pinning, and watching Say Yes to the Dress. The world is cold and quiet-- in shades of orange, red, brown, yellow and white. I laid in bed forever last night just looking out my window at the stars. They're so beautiful here. I'd almost forgotten.

I've been tirelessly searching for a job back in Lynchburg. Graduation will be here soon, and soon after that: the dreaded loan payments. Uhhhhh...yeah. I've applied to over 25 jobs...and so far: nothing. Tears. Nail-biting. Deep breaths. And Prayer.
Lots and lots of prayer.

But despite all the unsureness about what's to come, I have such a wonderful life.
And I serve a huge God.