Tuesday, June 29, 2010

The "Big-Girl" in Me

  Keeping house is pretty much one of my favorite things to do. I've gotta say that having my own apartment has unleashed the big-girl in me. I just sat down and made myself a budget, the dishes are clean, the counter is wiped down, the bathtub has been scrubbed, and the carpet is vacuumed (or should I say, "Swivel-Swept").

    There is left-over chicken casserole in the fridge and a grocery list written out (I'm thinking Fried Rice is in the works next). I've taken my vitamins every morning for the past week and a half and I drink Acai Berry Juice for kicks. Now, if I could just start exercising, we'd be good to go. Uh-huh.

    Overall, I'm starting to feel so much healthier and so much happier these days. Jesus gets the credit for it all. Thank You, Abba for providing so generously. You're beyond amazing.

-C

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Cape Charles

Look, Mom! (And Granddad!)


Subject Course Section Course Title
   Final Grade



WRSP 104 001 Harmonic Practices & Theory II
     A

Dear Germany,


I miss you, terribly.

-C

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Just a Hello


The apartment is coming together slowly, but surely. I've spent the past two days painting the place; all but the sun room, kitchen, and the bedroom. I've had to tell myself over and over again that Rome wasn't built in a day and not even that, but they had way more money than I do. It has yet to become everything I've been envisioning, but for a broke college kid, it's not looking too shabby either. It'll get there. Patience, Chelsea Cline. Patience.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Someday, husband

TO MY DEAR AND LOVING HUSBAND
Anne Bradstreet

If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee;
If ever wife was happy in a man,
Compare with me, ye women, if you can.
I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought but love from thee, give recompense.
Thy love is such I can no way repay,
The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.
Then while we live, in love let's so persevere
That when we live no more, we may live ever.

1641-1643?                                      1678

Never Fatal

Brentwood this past Sunday was incredible. I've already learned more these past three days than I have all year. More about guitar, about music, about leading. What's transpiring in my life these days is everything I've dreamt of for over a year now. I'm learning. I'm growing. As a musician and as a worship leader. It's the whole reason I came here.

I don't know if I've ever really said this on my blog, but the last thing I want to be is a worship leader. That probably makes no sense to you, I know - but it has nothing to do with what I want to do and it has everything to do with what God is calling me to do. I don't want to lead worship because for one, I honestly hate being infront of people and for two, I don't even think for a second that I'm good enough to do it. I would much, much, much rather be on the sidelines or somewhere in the background. I seriously have anxiety about leading and when God called me here, I honestly kicked and screamed the entire way to the Center for Worship. But I knew it's what God wanted me to do and even though my flesh was totally dead set against it, the Him in me is much, much greater. I've found myself saying over and over again, "Your will, Lord - not mine."

Even though ultimately the Spirit has gotten His way with me, my flesh has struggled and fought it's way through a solo in choir, worship in my worship 101 class, a worship recital and a classical jury, and this week at Brentwood and at a kids camp called Masters Inn. I was asked to play acoustic guitar at both Brentwood Church and at Masters Inn this week - playing songs I've never played before and songs I've never even heard before. At the camp, I've had to literally learn songs right before we go on, because we have no idea what the set list is going to be until we all show up. I've more than doubled my song catalog in a mere three days, and I've done more transposing on my guitar than I ever even knew was possible for me to do. I didn't even know I COULD transpose on guitar. Chop it up to good 'ole harmonic practices and theory (which, by the way - I got a 100% on my final exam)! I'm still not that quick at Nashville Numbers and transposing, but the awesome thing is that, I can do it. It's amazing when what you've been studying in school finally comes to life and enables you to actually keep up with the big dogs. I still feel totally inadequate, but I can at least hang in there.

As uncomfortable as it all may be, I'm so very thankful for the challenge and for the push God has given me. It's so encouraging when you're given a chance and an opportunity to grow and there are people who believe in you and push you as well.

Even after forgetting to put my capo on during the first song, then putting it on the wrong fret on the next song and then saying the longest, most ridiculous, most drawn-out, flustered and scatteredbrained prayer in the history of all prayers (it was HILARIOUSLY awful - seriously), I'm at peace knowing that's it's not about me. I'm at peace knowing that I'm being refined, not only as a person - but as a musican and as a leader. I'd go through that mortifying experience again, because I learned more in that moment than I ever have by being on the sidelines. I'm experiencing growing pains as a worship leader and musican, and no, it's not all that fun - but this entire blog was built around the fact that if Christ is in me and I'm in Him, failure is never fatal. Courage is the only thing.

 There is really no excuse for not stepping out when Christ calls us to go. We've gotta go after what He's called us to do, even when it's beyond us, because that's precisely when He's going to show the world that it's not beyond Him.

I'm soooo looking forward to what God is going to teach me this summer and for the rest of my time here in sweet, little, Lynchburg. It's my prayer that He truly, truly shines through it all - through my brighter moments and my darker moments. It's my prayer that I keep going, knowing full well that "Even the darkness will not be dark to You; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to You." (Psalm 139:12)

Failure is never fatal. Courage is the only thing.

-C

Monday, June 7, 2010

Stokedness

Gearing up for these upcoming three weeks and for a brand new chapter in the book we like to call life...










"For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." Mark 10:45


Pray for me,
-C

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Birds of the Sky

Whoa.


That's all I can come up with to describe the way I feel right now. I feel like I've been hit by a bus, for a lack of better cliches.

The Liberty bookstore is completely empty and I'm having a really hard time not listening to the baristas' conversation about God, the gospel, women and marriage. It's so hard to mind your own business, especially when the topics of God, the gospel, and marriage are involved. My heart beats harder every time I hear His name mentioned. One would think that overhearing a conversation about my sweet Jesus at Liberty University would be commonplace, but not so much, at least, not THIS kind of conversation. We're so used to hearing about Him in the classroom and at convocation and at prayer groups - sure, but to hear a sincere, Spirit-led conversation, with no agenda and no test afterward is simply refreshing. It's as if I just heard His name spoken for the first time.

I've been living in Forest for the past week with my brother and sister-in-law at their new house and have felt completely detached from campus, which is probably why I find myself at the bookstore now. Well, that and because I haven't had internet for the past week. Even though I'm still taking classes, it is sadly evident as I sit here that "college life" has taken a vacation. Campus is eerie, creepy, and this is one ghost-town of a bookstore. It's definitely not the same - depressing if anything. At least Campus Praise Band is playing over the speakers and I have an outlet for my computer. That'll keep the merry-men going for a while at least.




I'm approaching the final stretch of my music theory class and I'm proud to say that I've gotten really great grades thus far. The only thing left is the final tomorrow and then our three music projects that are due on Thursday. Then it's time to rear up for American Literature and Theology 202 (which I may or may not drop, I haven't decided yet...). I'm taking voice lessons as well, which aren't as scary seeming that there isn't a jury to sing in front of - a huge plus to everyone being gone.

I haven't found a job yet. Turns out the pickin's are pretty slim. I really wish I had one, because I would love to go shopping for some summer clothes, but alas - paying for a place to live and for food to eat is way more important. This week has been the most stressful week as far as not having any money goes. I came close to dropping the rest of my summer classes and heading back home, but Mom and Dad have stepped in huge and helped me out with rent and food money this month. I have never felt so helpless or inadequate before in my life. I've always been able to take care of and provide for myself, but God has been putting me in situations to rely on His help through my parents and through my brother and sister-in-law. If it weren't for them, I'd be kickin' it Beau Micah style and hammock-ing it the rest of the summer.

I don't think I'd fare as well as Beau Micah did.

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"


I've been resting in Matthew 6, allowing myself to believe His words and His truths about His love and provision - afterall, I have nothing left to lose. I've laid down my requests and have waited in expectation for that loan money to come through...except is still hasn't come through. Every time I check my LibertyOne account, I expect to see at least four digits and some cents, but so far it's come up the same: $4.36.

If He's not going to allow that money to come through, He's still going to get me through - we'll just have to take it one day at a time. He's faithful to the end, even when we may not be able see it. He is.

With some money in my checking account thanks to my dad, I prepared to move into my apartment yesterday and to cut a check for $600. I got my keys, opened the door, and let me just say that it was looking pretty rough. REALLY rough. It hadn't be touched at all. So I went back and told Ms. Heather and she scheduled to have it cleaned and ready to move-in by Monday and gave me the month of June for FREE and $200 off of July's rent.

Wait. Whhhhat?

When I could have given up and moved back home, He gave me the faith to hold on. We simply have to receive His help - in whatever manner it may come. He has given us everything we need to glorify Him, and He will continue to give us all we need in order to fulfill what He has called us to do. The LORD is faithful to the very end.

I'm staying in Lynchburg, baby! :)
for FREE!

"Blessed are those who receive help from the God of Jacob. Their hope rests on the LORD their God, who made heaven, earth, the sea, and everything in them. The LORD remains faithful forever." 

Psalm 146:5-6


Glory to God, forever.
-C