Sunday, April 25, 2010

Parting Ain't Easy

"Some people come into your life and end up changing your world."


A friend loves at all times.
Even when they have to go to college, get married, and move out of the house they've shared for two years in only two weeks notice.

Christ holds us all together.

Thank you for an amazing couple of years. 
i love you girls.

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17 


Proverbs 3
 1 My son, do not forget my teaching,
       but keep my commands in your heart,
 2 for they will prolong your life many years
       and bring you prosperity.
 3 Let love and faithfulness never leave you;
       bind them around your neck,
       write them on the tablet of your heart.
 4 Then you will win favor and a good name
       in the sight of God and man.
 5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
       and lean not on your own understanding;
 6 in all your ways acknowledge him,
       and he will make your paths straight. 
 7 Do not be wise in your own eyes;
       fear the LORD and shun evil.
 8 This will bring health to your body
       and nourishment to your bones.
 9 Honor the LORD with your wealth,
       with the firstfruits of all your crops;
 10 then your barns will be filled to overflowing,
       and your vats will brim over with new wine.
 11 My son, do not despise the LORD's discipline
       and do not resent his rebuke,
 12 because the LORD disciplines those he loves,
       as a father the son he delights in.
 13 Blessed is the man who finds wisdom,
       the man who gains understanding,
 14 for she is more profitable than silver
       and yields better returns than gold.
 15 She is more precious than rubies;
       nothing you desire can compare with her.
 16 Long life is in her right hand;
       in her left hand are riches and honor.
 17 Her ways are pleasant ways,
       and all her paths are peace.
 18 She is a tree of life to those who embrace her;
       those who lay hold of her will be blessed.
 19 By wisdom the LORD laid the earth's foundations,
       by understanding he set the heavens in place;
 20 by his knowledge the deeps were divided,
       and the clouds let drop the dew.
 21 My son, preserve sound judgment and discernment,
       do not let them out of your sight;
 22 they will be life for you,
       an ornament to grace your neck.
 23 Then you will go on your way in safety,
       and your foot will not stumble;
 24 when you lie down, you will not be afraid;
       when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.
 25 Have no fear of sudden disaster
       or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,
 26 for the LORD will be your confidence
       and will keep your foot from being snared.
 27 Do not withhold good from those who deserve it,
       when it is in your power to act.
 28 Do not say to your neighbor,
       "Come back later; I'll give it tomorrow"—
       when you now have it with you.
 29 Do not plot harm against your neighbor,
       who lives trustfully near you.
 30 Do not accuse a man for no reason—
       when he has done you no harm.
 31 Do not envy a violent man
       or choose any of his ways,
 32 for the LORD detests a perverse man
       but takes the upright into his confidence.
 33 The LORD's curse is on the house of the wicked,
       but he blesses the home of the righteous.
 34 He mocks proud mockers
       but gives grace to the humble.
 35 The wise inherit honor,
       but fools he holds up to shame.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Aletheia Meets Liberty

As much as I've missed my home church lately, it doesn't surprise me at all that God would give Liberty University the blessing of bringing in one of our Aletheia Pastors, Joshua Soto from Aletheia Richmond, to speak at this Friday's Convocation.

I just might cry.

Comfort Zones... longer exist in my world.

Why am I music major again? Anyone?

Monday, April 19, 2010


...I actually like my theory class.

Friday, April 16, 2010

English, Theory, Loans, and a God Who Has It All Under Control

At one point or another I'm going to start working on this English paper tonight.

There are a bunch of dudes who set up shop outside my window and are jamming out like there's no tomorrow. I'm sure you can hear them from wherever you are. On any other day I would love this, and I guess my heart is with them, but my head - ohhhh, my freakin' head...

It hurts so bad I think I might just cry.
Oh, wait - I am crying.

...on second thought: that's just me being dramatic.

(It's okay, you can agree. I can take a hit.)

So, let's see if I can sum you up on some of the happenings around good 'ole Liberty.

For starters: I have a tutor for music theory now on Fridays from 1:35-2:05 (which is right about the time I would be sinking my teeth into a Chick-fil-A sandwich...oh, the sacrifice....).

Remember how I told you that music theory was my favorite class in the whole world? Well, if there's anything I've learned, it's to choose my words a little more carefully because "Favorite class in the whole world" just isn't cutting it these days. And I mean, who could imagine why? Does "I64" have any significance to you other than it being an interstate? Yeah. It didn't to me either. But now it's the difference between me getting an A in the class and getting a B....

...or a C?

Oh, please not a C.

Pretty darn significant that second inversion chord.


I feel like it's been a good semester. Of course, I look back and know I could have done better (but then again, couldn't we always do better?). Everything looks like a piece of cake when you're looking back on it. When you're in the middle of it though, it's a different story. Sometimes you think you'll never make it to the other side.

It's registration time again and that means that financial check-in dead lines are looming right around the corner flashing their vicious dollar signs at me. It's a nightmare, really. I don't know if I'm going to get enough money to take summer classes or even fall classes, nor do I even have a place to live yet, but God will provide, God will provide. In His own sweet time.

Oh, Lord - please provide on time.

Talking to my dad is always the worst. God love him, but sometimes the only thing he's good at is freaking me out. Yes, I realize I'm going to have to pay all of these loans back. Yes, I realize I'm not going to get a "good" job when I graduate. Yes, I know that paying everything back will be virtually impossible.
I know, I know, I know....BUT....

...who am I to say "No" to God?

This is where He wants me and this is what He wants me to do - for a whole lot of reasons I don't understand - but, I'll trust Him.

I'll trust Him.

"Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will IS."
Ephesians 5:15-17

When I first started reading the Bible, I remember seeing this verse practically jump off the page. It says, "understand what the Lord's will IS." First of all, we're to understand His will - meaning that it CAN be understood. Not only that - but we're to understand what His will IS. Not what it could be in the future or what it was in the past - but what it IS, right here - right now.

I have no idea what God wants me to do with my life, all I can see is today. All I can see is right now and right now I think that God wills me to say a little prayer, take about three Aleve, and make the most out of this English paper I have to write.

Because He...
He has already taken care of everything.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

It's Not the Best Thing

"Being "in love" is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now, no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at fact, the state of being in love usually does not last...but of course ceasing to be "in love" need not mean ceasing to love. a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit, reinforced by the grace which both partners ask and receive from God... they can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be "in love" with someone else. Being in love first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep their promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it."

-C.S. Lewis

Wednesday, April 14, 2010


I've been having so much trouble sleeping lately and it's about driving me freaking insane.

And now that that's out of the bag, let's move on, shall we?

Liberty in the spring time. Man, oh, man.

Well, first off - it's beautiful. I used to think that there was no prettier campus than James Madison - and well, that's probably still true - but I think Liberty is definitely a close second.

Ring by Spring is definitely in full swing. A quad-mate of mine and a few of my friends have gotten engaged and then others have started dating and it's just oh-so-disgusting. Just kidding...

(but really).

A lot has been on my mind lately. Aside from the never ending pile of theory homework and figuring everything out from fall registration, to money, to living arrangements, to what church I'm going to start going to, to leading worship, to relationships - I'd say that the bigger part of it all is just focusing on who the Lord has called me to be, and reminding myself...constantly...that He loves me. All of me.

Just as I am.

It's spring, and that means the pressures to get skinny and tan are rising just as quickly as the temperatures are.

I never really get into the hype, but the lies try so hard to convince me that if I was tanner, skinnier, and a little less modest, that maybe I'd reap someone's love and faithfulness. Bogus.

Truth is that if you catch a man like that, you're going to have to keep him like that, and frankly - that's just too much work, let alone not worth it.

I'm convinced:

There is nothing more beautiful than knowing my Savior.

The tan will fade as soon as the sun gets farther and farther away from the earth, but a gentle and quiet spirit is imperishable and precious in the sight of God.

There is nothing more intriguing to me or more satisfying, than becoming who Christ has called me to be - to be precious in His sight. Who cares if it's in His sight alone?

His sight is the only sight that matters.


"Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." 
1 Peter 3:4

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised." 
  Proverbs 31:30

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will."
Romans 12:2

Tuesday, April 13, 2010


every seed dies before it grows

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:  a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace." Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

sometimes we have to let things happen how they want to happen. we try so hard to breathe life into something that the Lord just wants to die, not realizing that death is an 'okay' thing. Death in the Christian life actually equates to life - so really, it's even better than 'okay'. It's just having the faith and the courage enough to believe it. 

oh, how the times are changing.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Heading Towards Home

I decided at about five o'clock that I was going to drive home today to spend some time with my family. I made it to Afton on a quarter tank of gas and just in time for the sunset. So on the spur of the moment, I pulled over and got onto BlueRidge Parkway, drove up a little ways to this overlook, and just marveled at the glory of God. Now, don't get me wrong - the iPhone can do a whole lot, but I'm afraid it doesn't even come close to capturing how amazingly breathtaking this actually was. The attempt was made anyways.

I actually live here???

After my little detour and an hour long phone conversation with Byrd, I get home, open the fridge to get something to drink and spot these pretty babies...

Only in New Market can you find the progeny of your pet turkey in the fridge...

...and I must admit, it's pretty amazing.

God is so good,

Friday, April 9, 2010


"And I know there will be days when this life brings me pain, but if that's what it takes to praise You - Jesus bring the rain."

In some small corner of my heart I always wonder if Jesus was warning me about the road that lay ahead.

"There will be so many people in this world who will love you and then they'll leave you. But I promise you; I love you and I will never leave you."

I thought He was just saying that to comfort me for my past heartaches, but now I'm beginning to wonder if He was telling me that so I would know to take refuge in His love and in His promise when that heartache would decide to strike again, and harder than I could have ever imagined.

It's been pouring most of the day and for some reason I've gotten these sudden urges to go on a walk. I'm not even going to pretend, but part of me does kind of wish I had someone to go on a walk with. Please, don't get me wrong - I'm more than content with being "single" but I also know that somewhere out there, God is preparing a man to be my husband and on a spring evening like this, when the rain is pouring down - I really wish I had him to go on a walk with. I know that the Lord is working to have us both ready at the same time (because I can't say I'm ready for him yet, either...) and I'm fine with waiting - but it still didn't keep me from missing him this evening...whoever he may be.

And then a sweet whisper slowly seeped into that worried corner of my heart at about the same time the guilt tried to, but His Words made it there first...
"It's okay that you miss him and wish him here soon, I understand. Trust Me - I want that for You more than anything...
...but for now, and until then,
won't you take a walk with Me in the rain?"

I know this might sound utterly pathetic, but I feel like that walk with Him this evening was a picture of Him walking me through life. Cherishing those last years, days, and moments before He hands the responsibility and care of His daughter over to someone who's worthy enough and brave enough to take her hand.

...and until that time - it's His time.

The thing about the rain, is that I don't necessarily like it all that much. But what it all comes down to, is that it isn't about the rain as much as it is about Who I'm walking through it with - and not only that, but also the new growth that will spring up because of it.

He told me two years ago in a dream that there would be so many people in my life who would say that they love me and then leave...

...but He didn't say that everyone would.

And even if everyone did, I know that without a shadow of a doubt that never in this life, would it ever be Him.

Security is basing one's confidence in that which cannot be taken away and that, my friends - is what makes walking in the rain not only worth it, but freaking beautiful.


Sunday, April 4, 2010

So I'm Trying to Write a Blog....

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...and that's about all I got.