Forty-Four

My eyes are heavy. So very heavy.

Two services in one day, basically right back to back, a good hearty lunch afterwards, and a 3.5 hour drive back home will do that to ya, I suppose.

Annie invited me to come sing with her at her home church in Roanoke a couple of weeks ago, so my ever faithful roadie and I made the trek towards Star City yesterday in time to practice with Annie's little sister who is an amazing celloist and way too mature and way too hilarious for her own good - but I mean really, what's to expect? Her last name is Lawrence for cryin' out loud.

That family is:

1) hilarious,
2) talented,
3) so entirely genuine and,
4) such a blessing to know.

So basically, they're the Gwaltney's of Roanoke.


The three of us girls played during communion this morning for both the early morning service and the eleven o'clock service. I felt a little uneasy about not having a full band behind us, but the correlation of guitars and cello sounded so rich and full and well, God is always good and always worthy of praise, no matter the circumstance. It was an amazing time and I was blessed to have gotten to play music with two of my sisters for Him this morning. The nerves were actually pretty minimal (considering their church is HUGE), but I might have just been too tired to notice; we stayed up until two in the morning watching Twilight.

Don't judge me.



I guess we could say that it's been hitting me more recently...

Worship. A response to a relationship we don't deserve.

It's been hard to retreat lately into what's been comfortable for me. He's been putting me in situations way out of my comfort zone within the worship ministry. Such situations demand for a good throwing up of the hands and a loud exhale of, "Yep, God. This is totally gonna have to be You because I am so incredibly unable, not to mention a horrible person and completely scared out of my flippin' mind to lead these people."


Here's the thing: whether or not He's calling me to lead worship, my aim in life is and always will be to worship. To know Him for who He is and to live my life in response to who He is.
Truth is, worship is not about me at all.

I don't know the outcome of my calling, only the direction in which I should go. Even though the full-purpose eludes me, taking those steps with the Lord is what I need to be doing. It's going to change me, no doubt. Every step will be in faith. He's confirmed it and reconfirmed it: I have to be brave, persevere, and walk with Him.


There's no turning back now.

"Jesus said to him, 'No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.'"

Luke 9:62

FORTY-FOUR DAYS,

C